Made to Last Forever? Ayurveda?

''God has...planted eternity in the human heart. '' 

Ecclesiastes 3:11 

"Surely God would not have created such a being as man to exist for a day!  No, man was made for immortality." 

Abraham Lincoln
Sometimes I wonder if I would really want to last forever.  God, I am so tired, I find it hard to get up and begin another day, let alone, doing this for eternity.  I have no ENERGY, although I have been praying for it. 

This weekend, I did  find a book on Holistic Healing.  It actually jumped off the shelf at me while my daughter and I were shopping at the local bookstore.  As I was walking by it mysteriously fell off the shelf.  In it, there is a chapter on Energy, among other things, and Ayurveda, which is the oldest system of medicine on earth.

Normally, due to my Christian background, I would dismiss this book as New Age and put it back on the shelf, but, as I flipped through it, I knew I must read it.  I must keep an open mind.  Why God would lead me in this direction, I am not sure, but in my heart I just know, this is where I am going to find ENERGY for living a healthy, happy, wholesome life.  I want to know more about Ayurveda.  I do believe that God is leading me to find out more about this.

I can honestly tell you, I have never in my life heard of this.  I have been devouring this book over the weekend, and have found that food is a medicine.  (I already know this) , however, the problem I have is finding the discipline to eat the food that is good for me.  I am an emotional eater. 

I am also a kapha body type, according to a test I took in the book.  In order to balance my body type the first thing it says I should do is "LET GO".  This makes me laugh, because I have a STRANGLE HOLD on life, and lately, I have become a bit of a hoarder.  It says I hold on to THINGS, even WEIGHT, PEOPLE and EMOTIONS.  I need to loosen up and TRUST A LITTLE, and release anything I am holding on to too tightly.  I need to TRUST there will always be enough. 

I am supposed to welcome change, unpredictability and excitement into my life, even though kapha's love routine and feel safe and secure when everything stays the same.  Taking a risk, and allowing my pulse to race will give me an ENERGY boost!  I also need to get my system moving!  I agree, I have been like Winnie the Pooh lately.  I am also supposed to follow the Kapha Diet, avoid iced food and drinks, cut down on sweet things and don't eat too much bread.  Dairy products irritate, and causes mucous and inflammation....hmmmmm.  Wheat can be a problem, and heavy starchy foods also. 

This surprised  me because I have been thinking I am Gluten intolerant, and even perhaps lactose intolerant.  However, I love these foods. 

Anyway, I think I have said enough about my new find, and this is my answer to prayer in regard to gaining more ENERGY for actually living on purpose.

Day Four

I suppose if I felt better, Eternity living, would be more appealing to me, so I feel led to pray for discipline to do the things necessary to feel better. 
If this life is a preparation for the next, I had better start preparing, and taking care of business, and myself.

Point to Ponder

There is more to life than the here and now.

Verse to Remember

"This world is fading away, along with everything it craves.  But if you do the will of God, you will live forever".  1 John 2:17

Question to Consider

Since I was made to last forever, what is the one thing I should stop doing and the one thing I should start doing today?

I am drawing a blank...I honestly don't know, perhaps I need to trust a little, and let go a bit?  Maybe stop playing it safe and start taking some risks, to get my pulse pumping? 

Pantheistic Deity ? What Drives My Life?

Day Three

Until this moment, I did not know what a "Pantheistic Deity" was.  Here is the definition I found:

Pantheism is the view that the Universe (Nature) and God are identical.[1] Pantheists thus do not believe in a personal, anthropomorphic or creator god. The word derives from the Ancient Greek: πᾶν (pan) meaning ‘all’ and θεός (theos) meaning ‘God’. As such, Pantheism denotes the idea that “God” is best seen as a way of relating to the Universe.[2] Although there are divergences within Pantheism, the central ideas found in almost all versions are the Cosmos as an all-encompassing unity and the sacredness of Nature.

Issues


Use of religious vocabulary

A significant debate within the pantheistic community is about the use of the word “God.” Pantheists do not believe in a God in the common and traditional sense of a personal creator being. Some modern Pantheists avoid using God-words altogether, since they regard them as misleading. Others feel that the word God is essential to express the strength of their feelings towards Nature and the Universe.

Some critics have argued that pantheism is little more than a redefinition of the word “God” to mean “Nature,” “Universe”, or “reality”. However, in Pantheism the word God, when used, is more an expression of the user’s feelings rather than of some supernatural power in the Universe.

When pantheism is considered as an alternative to theism there is a denial of theistic claims. For example, theism is the belief in a “personal” God that transcends (is separate from) the world. Pantheists deny the existence of a personal God. They deny the existence of a “minded” Being that has intentional states and associated capacities like the ability to make decisions.

I am understanding that a Pantheistic Deity, is not personal, and is not separate from the world, or above it.  A Pantheistic Deity is not a Creator of the Universe, but Nature and the Universe itself.  If this is so, then, I don't have a personal saviour, and I am no more special than any other entity, including a rock, or a flower, or a butterfly.


Even I, a person who feels inadequate, unworthy, and at times as lowly as a worm, think that in the grand scope of things, my existence means more than that of any of these things. 

There are disagreements as to whether Pantheism is atheistic or not. Atheists argue the non-theistic god of pantheism is not a god (according to the traditional definition),[13] while others suggest a deity is not necessarily transcendent.[14]

Day Three and What Drives My Life? 


One of my followers, threw some thoughts into, my "Shift".  I think it is no coincidence, and, I am searching, so, I have to admit I am a little intrigued.  For some reason, I am not afraid of new ideas or concepts about God, in fact, I welcome them. 


I have always thought of God as the Creator of all things.  Perhaps this was taught to me during my childhood, or just a absorbed by osmosis by society around me.  I am not sure.


I did not attend church as a child until the age of eleven, and I honestly don't remember any religious rituals, other than my mom teaching us to say our prayers each night, which consisted of:


"Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep,
if I should die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul would take.
God bless Mommy and Daddy, Jimmy and Davey, Jackie and Danny, and all those I love.  Amen"


I would usually throw in Susie Q too or any other pets we had at the time too, and quite frankly, this prayer scared the crap out of me, especially the part about dying before I wake, and taking my soul.  I didn't understand it at all, and I never found it comforting except for the Blessings part.  I always like the part about blessings...


My mom would always say "Do unto others, as you would have them do unto you", and she said this was the Golden Rule, and the only rule we needed to live by.  I thought about this a lot, and understood it, and tried hard to live by it.  I was a good kid, a really good, sweet kid.  I never wanted to hurt anyone or anything. 


I loved nature, animals, the sky, trees, the stars, all of this, but not once did I see it as God.  I always thought God created a beautiful world.


I stopped believing in God  for a time, when evil touched my life, I began to believe in darkness, and fear, and unfairness, guilt, resentment and anger, pain, the approval of others, and materialism, and I let these things drive my life...I didn't care much about the golden rule.  Now I think, hurt people, hurt people, including themselves. 


Today, mostly fear and guilt, drive my life.  What do I want it to be?  God and LOVE.


"You Lord give perfect peace to those who keep their purpose firm and put their trust in you" Isaiah 26:3


I can honestly say, the things that have been driving my life have not brought me peace.  I want to trust in a Good God, but I am not sure I know how to do that, but I want to.  I want change, more than I want to stay where I am.  I hope there is a personal God, a loving God.  I pray that He would reveal himself to me, I am also praying for ENERGY.

Day Two - A Paradigm Shift? I Am Not An Accident?

This morning I awoke at my usual time of 7 a.m., but instead of getting up, I shut off my alarm, and my cell phone, let the dog out, had a bathroom visit, then so unlike me, even I was surprised, I jumped back into bed and pulled the covers over my head and fell into a deep and restful sleep.  Now this is a work day, but for some reason, it just did not matter, and for the first time in years, my restless, uncontrollable mind was quiet.  It did not tell me I had to get up and get going, it did not tell me there was so much to do, it did not tell me I was lazy, it did not tell me anything!  It felt like peace...but then, I am not completely sure what peace feels like, because I have not had a lot of it in my life.

So, I slept, until I couldn't sleep anymore, and when I awoke, I did not feel even a tinge of guilt, and everything was extremely still.  I didn't ache, I did not desire anything, I was not worried about anything.  All, was well in my tumultuous world of thoughts?  How on earth did that happen?  It felt as though something had shifted.

Then, desire hit me, desire to write, and so here I am, writing to you about this unremarkable event, yet deep inside me, I know it is a turning point, a shift, a momentous moment in time, something has changed, but what it is, I have no idea.  It came from something outside of myself, yet deep within my being.  Weird, all I can say is weird. 

I decide to find a photo of a Shift, and so I google it, and this is what I find, it seems so perfect. Until this moment, I have honestly never heard of a "Paradigm Shift" and so I looked up the definition of it:

WHAT IS A PARADIGM SHIFT?

In 1962, Thomas Kuhn wrote The Structure of Scientific Revolution, and fathered, defined and popularized the concept of "paradigm shift" . Kuhn argues that scientific advancement is not evolutionary, but rather is a "series of peaceful interludes punctuated by intellectually violent revolutions", and in those revolutions "one conceptual world view is replaced by another".

Think of a Paradigm Shift as a change from one way of thinking to another. It's a revolution, a transformation, a sort of metamorphosis. It just does not happen, but rather it is driven by agents of change.

Interesting is all I can say...interesting and weird all at the same time.  Can it be true?  Has my thinking been transformed?  God, I hope so.

Day Two

"God doesn't play dice."
             - Albert Einstein

I am not an accident.  God had a plan in creating me.  Long before I was conceived by my parents, I was conceived in the mind of God.  God made me, so He could love me.  God is LOVE.  God says to me, and for the very first time in my life, I think I have the capacity to believe it...

"I have carried you since you were born; I have taken care of you from your birth.  Even when you are old, I will be the same.  Even when your hair has turned gray, I will take care of you.  I made you and will take care of you."  Isaiah 46:3-4

With all my heart, I want to believe this, and in this moment I do.  I have no fear of the future, all my stress is gone, I have felt God's Love and His Presence this morning. 

I can finally accept myself, my life, my job, my circumstances, my financial insecurity, my family, my friends, my personality, my background, and even my physical appearance.  In this moment, I do believe, I believe it is all NO ACCIDENT, it is all exactly the way it is supposed to be. 

Oh God, I pray this shift will last...

Day One - It's Not About Me?

I have been writing in my Journal ... it helps me with my unruly thought processes and I find it very relaxing. 

 After reading Day One of the Purpose Driven Life, I realize I have been starting my search for purpose , from the wrong premice.   I have decided to "Begin with God", rather than myself.  I believe, He is the source of all life, and without God, life really makes no sense.  At least my life is making no sense. 

"Everything got started in Him and finds it's purpose in Him."

Colossians 1:16

The question to consider:  In spite of all the advertising around me, how can I remind myself that life is really about living for God, not myself?

I thought about this a lot, and decided that the best way to remind myself is with this blog, journalling, meditating and prayer.  I must confess that I am really not sure how to live for God, I am not really even sure what that means.  However, I don't know what it means to live for myself either.  I am still at a loss, but have a sense that I just might be headed in the right direction. 

I Will Have My Answer in 40 Days

What on Earth am I here for?

     I am a self centered person, but I also think that most people are pretty darned Narcissistic.  The problem is, I sincerely want to change.  Thinking about me all the time has not made me very happy, and if I remember correctly, I was not always this way. 

Just a few short years ago, I didn't think about myself every single moment of the day, but lately I do, and, in the grand scope of things in this world, my life is really not so bad.  However,  the problem is, my grand scope of things usually consists of my family and friends, and it seems by comparison to them, I have no life at all.  I need a change desperately.

I am older , so you would think I would have all of this figured out by now, and be so much further along physically, emotionally , spiritually, and  above all, FINANCIALLY! 

Sometimes, I think I am damaged goods, damaged by living, loving, and trying to be good in this evil world that I believe we live in. 

I have been hurt deeply many times, and because I just stuff things, then deny their existence, a lot of my wounds have never healed. 

I don't deal with pain well.  The worst pain for me is emotional pain, and I will do almost anything to avoid it.  I  avoid involvement with others, and usually run for the hills if anyone gets too close.  However, I want to change this too, because I have become more lonely , than I can bear.

I have been praying lately, and the truth is, I used to have a pretty good relationship with God.  I think I must have run from Him too, because we have not been close in a very long time.  It has been a long time since I have prayed. 

I must say, after all this time, it seemed pretty strange.  I got down on my knees, and spoke out loud.  "Oh God, help me,  show me what to do.  I know I have run away from You, my life, my faith, my family.  I was angry and hurt,  and now I am very lost and can not find my way back.  I 've run amuck, and I am stuck in this dark and dreary place, where my thoughts have become bleak.  I want to come home.  Please, please God, show me the way."

Nothing happened right away, but kept asking myself  and God,  "What is the purpose of my life?"  "Why am I here?"  "Why was I born?" 

I have also been trying to meditate, but I can not seem to quiet my unruly mind.  I did not think it has been working, but suddenly, I had this thought , one that I kept trying to dismiss.  "The answer will come in 40 days".  I tried and tried to let go of this but it kept rolling around and around in my brain. 

Later that same day, I was dusting my book shelf and the title of a book caught my eye.  It was " The Purpose Driven Life" by Rick Warren.  I took the book from the shelf, and although, I had started reading this book before, and actually got to day ten, it all seemed new to me.  On the cover it said "What on Earth am I here for?" and inside I read "your next 40 days".  I was stunned.  "Could this be my answer that will come in 40 days?"

It all seemed too simple, but from what I know about God, that is certainly in keeping with His way.